Or do you?

 

Winning back your ex, dating and relationship advice from Lea HabenIf you’ve recently suffered a break up you may be teetering on the hope of reuniting with your loved one.  Despite the fact that your relationship has ended you may be looking to re-connect with your ex.  You may be wondering how can I get him back.  It’s not as hard as you might think but I implore you to evaluate before proceeding.

Why did your relationship end in the first place?  Before trying to win back an ex step back and understand what caused your relationship to change.  Did you become complacent in your relationship?  Were you authentic from the beginning or were you trying to become someone you weren’t in order to avoid being alone?  Relationships sometimes have a shelf life and re-engaging may not be in your best interest.

Think long and hard as to why your relationship ended and realistically assess whether you really want your ex back or whether you just don’t want to be alone.  If after your assessment you still decide you want your ex back here are some tips that really work.

  1. No Contact – Don’t call, text or plead with your ex.  These are normal reactions but actually kill your chances of winning back your ex.  Don’t panic, calm down and realize that if you don’t put some distance between you and your ex you will solidify the break up.  Remember don’t call text, Facebook or go to his familiar haunts.  If you don’t follow this most important tip you may anger you ex to the point of no return.  Give yourself at least 30 days before you contact your ex.
  2. Reality Check – Spend some time evaluating your life without the relationship.  Spend some time on you.  Exercise, get healthy, and start developing hobbies and interest outside of men and relationships.  Commit to having a life for yourself and spend more time with your girlfriends.  Men want to contribute to your happiness but don’t want to be responsible for it.  Evaluate the quality of the relationship by removing the emotional elements and look solely at the facts.  Do a pro’s and cons’s list and see which list is longer.  If after careful reflection you decide the relationship is worth salvaging then move onto tip 3.
  3. Get your Ex back – Winning back your ex, dating and relationship advice from Lea HabenIn order to move forward and get your relationship back on track you will need to bring back attraction, romance and connection.  You will have to renew his feelings of desirability and love.  Dating other people casually is a way to make your ex realize what he is missing.  It is also a great way to boost your confidence and take your mind off your ex.  It shows your ex that your are confident, desirable and ready to move on (In other words— it totally ups your stock).
  4. Take your time – Enjoy your life and commit to taking it slow and remember when you believe in yourself others will too.  A Big smile and self-confidence is sexier than any Victoria Secret lingerie you put on.  People love to be around people who are low maintenance and make them feel better about themselves.

Breakups are always hard, especially if you have been with someone for a long time.  If you proceed with these steps you stand a good chance to win your ex back.  Please make sure you want them back for the right reasons.  Being alone can be hard but you just may find what you have been searching for… the real you.