It’s time to talk about what men want — and why it doesn’t really matter, at least when it comes to the way women dress and act.

5022571528_3fae1cf016_oThere are countless quizzes out there to tell you what personality trait your guy loves most about you or what you should wear on your first date. There are even more articles on “How to be more attractive to men” or “One beauty trend that men hate most on women”. Maybe we’re even been guilty of clicking on or reading them (I’m not ashamed to admit it). My response to all of these ridiculous suggestions is who cares?

There is nothing more offending to a woman than a man trying to tell her how to dress or be herself. Guys don’t like high-waisted shorts? So what. My man isn’t a fan of my red lips because it makes me unkissable? Tough luck. If I’m going for a 50s vibe tonight, the lipstick is staying. If your guy is really into you, he won’t care what’s on your lips.

Even worse are the tips articles telling you how to be the perfect woman or how not to annoy your boyfriend. They suggest that women’s “annoying” tendencies, which I personally think make us adorable, need to end to stop offending men. When did it become appropriate for us to change anything about ourselves for a man?

It shouldn’t matter whether or not a guy approves of your outfit. If you like it, then that automatically makes it good enough. You should never have to cover up your humor or quirky personality to impress a man. The guy who sticks around for the real you is the guy you want around anyways.

Joan_Rivers_3_Musto_Party_2010_ShankboneYes, I sometimes get emotional over things. Yes, I probably spend too much time getting ready in the morning. Yes, I can spend hours on Pinterest planning out an entire month in outfits. The things that make us women are not flaws, but strengths. It’s time we started viewing them that way and stop trying to change them.

This week we lost a comedy queen who paved the way for women everywhere. Joan Rivers made it okay for us to be outrageous and loose-lipped and hilarious. She brought attention to the fact that a 30-year-old single woman is viewed as being pathetic, whereas a 90-year-old bachelor is a catch. She made history as the first female to host her own program on the Fox network in 1986. As far as Joan was concerned, not even the sky was the limit for women. Some would call her rude, but I call her brave.

genderequalityLast time I checked, a woman’s purpose in life is not to please a man. We weren’t put on this earth to impress them, or look good for them, or even walk behind them. We are here to walk beside men. There are some men who claim that women haven’t done anything to earn respect or equality. The simple answer to that “proposition” is women are people too, and our basic human right is respect.

Feminism is constantly viewed as aiming to bring down men in our efforts to run the world. Really, we just want equality. We aren’t here to fight men, but we would greatly appreciate them fighting with us. I encourage men to stop joining in creating a beauty standard for women, or trying to tell us what makes us the perfect woman or not, and just love us for all our womanly glory. Men should be proud of their wife for becoming the CEO of her company, not intimidated. There are many different ways for men to support their woman, starting with letting her be truly herself.