As a student in my twenties people often question my relationship status over cups of coffee. It is simply a natural question that is normal for friends and acquaintances to inquire on, but for some reason when I say the horrible ‘s word’ (single) I instantly wish I could take it back. If I say that I am single I feel them look at me with sympathy like I am extremely lonely or desperately searching for a sole mate. Honestly though, I am so beyond happy at the point I am at right now that I am the furthest from being alone. I always try to explain that I am not ignoring the world of dating, but I am simply not actively pursuing a serious relationship at the time.
Now, that doesn’t mean I sit at home on the weekends scouring through fashion blogs, though I do tend to do this on occasion, I feel that I have a promising social and dating life as a young adult beginning to create a life and career of my own.
I love meeting new people and going out with new guys, but of course I have myself a little checklist that must be met within the first few dates or else he is a no-go. And no, this isn’t a checklist for marriage, but more or less for if I even see us being compatible enough to throughly enjoy our time together.
√ Educated – For me this is the biggest attribute a guy can offer. I don’t bring a sudoku on the first date and request him to finish it before we can order, but seeing that a guy has or is working towards a full education is vital to me. By education I don’t just mean book smarts though, as a journalism major is it imperative that he is also knowledgable on social issues and the present world around him. I feel that I work hard to continually improve my education and if the person I am in a relationship with is not willing to also work towards this, I have a hard time seeing us together down the road.
√ Respectful – This is also a huge attribute that I feel a guy should have. Along with a vast education, a guy must not only be respectful to me but also to the world around us. I feel that many guys are no only sexist but also quite rude today, and I can’t stand to be around that negative energy for more than a few minutes – so the possibility of a future for us as a couple would be extremely limited. Having mutual respect in a relationship is also a basis for trust to me, I feel that most guys that are respectful for women are also very trusting and this helps me to be able to fully trust them.
√ Ambitious – I would say this is the third largest attribute I search for in a man. I proud myself on being extremely ambitious in with my education and I am quite ambitious plans for my future, so for me if a guy is not equally ambitious there is no way it can work. I don’t want to say that he must be the CEO of a company, but I must be with someone who is constantly aspiring for more and dreams of being the best person he can be. I honestly wan the most out of life and I feel that unless the person I am dating is also interested in reaching for the stars then we cannot be in a relationship.
Ladies of the twenties, if you don’t have yourself a little checklist of compatibility I suggest you start one immediately. Even if you play the game a little bit off of your list, have a checklist to make sure you don’t cave on any of your relationship aspirations three months down the road – plus it can save you quite a lot of time!