Are you mad at me?

“Are you mad at me?” is one of the most common questions that couples ask one another. This classic question dates back to Prehistoric times. It was first uttered by a Tyrannosaurus Rex when he was afraid that his Brontosaurus wife was upset with him.

Of course he didn’t ask this question out loud and in English; that would be ridiculous. He wrote it with a rock on the wall of their love cave, which was later found by the Romans and translated by Marie Antoinette before she died of a red velvet cupcake overdose. And that ladies and gentleman, is your history and science lesson for the day.

As you can tell, history and science are not my strong suits. Sure, I took both classes at the prestigious University of Wisconsin…River Falls, but at that time, I had undiagnosed ADD and spent most classes feverishly shaking my leg under my desk, thinking about the scrapbooks I would never finish, doodling in my notebook in a desperate attempt to finally master the art of drawing a successful 3D cube and being distracted by a classmate whom I had a crush on.

I liked staring at his feet. He wore Converse tennis shoes and tied his shoe laces around his ankles. At the time, I thought his shoe lace placement was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

I imagined that he did this in order to rebel against an oppressive world led by Fred Rogers and his “Neighborhood” – a world of obsessive compulsive patterns that conditioned us to believe that we could only feel whole if upon entering our homes each day, we sang a song begging people to be our neighbors while putting on a cardigan sweater and the same pair of blue tennis shoes that we tied the “right way.”

From the ankles down, he was living off the grid and raging against a machine of societal norms that were forced upon children of the 70′s and 80′s by public television. His rebellious nature and passion for being the change he wanted to see in the world, was intoxicating.

Sadly, ten years later, this passion is gone. From the looks of his Facebook page, he’s given up the fight. He’s married now. Everyone’s married. And in holy matrimony one must tie his or her shoes the “right way.”

I often wonder why we ask a question we already know the answer to. If you have to ask a person if they are mad at you, they most likely are. This question is most commonly asked during a disagreement, after you’ve said something inconsiderate or after you are caught cyberstalking the boy you had a crush on in college.

This question is never asked during a picnic in the park on a sunny spring day while the two of you blissfully ponder the names of your future children. Instead it’s asked while sitting in a 98 Honda Civic in the drive-thru line at Arby’s after he’s given you the silent treatment for the past 5 miles because you woke him up at five in the morning to express how hurt you are that he gave you the “Way to have no self-control, fatty” look after you finished an entire pizookie during dinner.

You then wouldn’t let him go back to sleep until he assured you that the giant cookie skillet you inhaled in less than two minutes was actually quite small and that it was probably only 100 calories since you saved a corner piece for him. Sure, he didn’t eat that piece, you did, but the offer was given.

Then you locked yourself in the bathroom and cried until he demanded you open the door or he was leaving forever. In this case, there is no reason to ask, “Are you mad at me?” It’s safe to assume that he is.

His silence speaks volumes and the fact that six hours later you are now in line at Arby’s is definitely a sign that you are both eating your feelings.

So in the spirit of my once rebellious and progressive college crush, I am going to attempt NOT to ask such an obvious question in my relationship.

Instead I will assume that he is definitely mad when I make him an hour late to every function we attend due to my procrastination and the fact that I still believe that I can “be ready in five minutes.”

In lieu of asking this question, I will apologize, promise to work on my lack of time perception and offer to buy him Arby’s.

What woman want in an auto repair shop

This is not an article to discuss the popular movie of the same name or give advice on hormone replacement. It’s a review of what women want when they are looking for an auto repair facility.

I know what I want from an auto repair shop, but I’ve been in the auto industry most of my career as well as being exposed to dealership repair departments and local mom and pop tire centers. My brother owned a repair shop in Roslyn, New York and my Two for the Road radio partner, Bill, owned one in Arizona.

One thing I’ve observed no matter the gender is that we all want to be treated equally, whether it’s in corporate America, the grocery store or buying a car. So when it comes to fixing our cars, replacing tires or an oil and lube, we want to be able to trust the facility where we bring our business and establish a relationship.

Over the years I’ve been asked by women in particular, how do I find a repair shop that I can trust, what do I look for, and the all-important concern, “please don’t let me be ripped off.”

The best way to start on your search is to ask a friend, family member or even a coworker where they bring their car. Decide ahead of time if you want to be close to your office or your home? Once you have a few names, give them all a call and better yet, visit the location in person.

Your vehicle is one of the largest purchases you will make in your lifetime and it serves you and your family well to keep it safe and in tip top condition.

You wouldn’t go to just any doctor to repair your heart, without checking him or her out, nor should you when it comes to the maintenance of your car.

When you do go to visit the shops recommended, here are some things to look for and ask:

• When you walk in, are you greeted with a “hello” or “I’ll be right with you?” Do you feel comfortable in your immediate surroundings?

• Is the waiting room clean and equipped with comfortable seating? Are there magazines to read and do they have signs indicating WiFi is available?

• Are their awards and certificates on the wall from circa 1972 or more recent? Do they work with nonprofits; do they give back to the community?

• Are there photos of the owners and the technicians with their certifications; such as ASE? Is the repair facility approved by any reputable company such as AAA, NARPRO, Garagefly, Better Business Bureau or Repairpal?

• Are the folks behind the counter courteous and does he or she answer your questions with respect and clarity? Women don’t want to be spoken down to, but more often than not, provided with more detail.

• Ask what their warranty policy is on work and parts. Make sure they call you before doing additional work without your approval. If the shops have the approval of credible organizations, you can feel confident the techs themselves are qualified to do the work.

• Find out what the turnover is in shop. There are shops that have employees for 25 and 30 years. Women want to establish a rapport with employees and feel confident they will be there the next time they bring in their car.

• Don’t hesitate to ask if you can walk in to the bay area to see how clean the floors, the tools and the technicians are. Be aware that there are safety rules about customers is work areas, so don’t be turned off it they seem cautions or reluctant, but they should be able to take you far enough so you will get the idea. Do they have a FREE pick up and deliver policy to your home or office?

• Many women bring their children with them while they wait for a repair or estimate. Is there a play area for the children? Is there a television?

• Does the waiting room serve beverages? Some repair shops go all out with latte machines and fancy creamers, but a nice cup of coffee or tea served in a mug, not a Styrofoam cup, is a welcomed perk.

Don’t feel that all these added conveniences will raise the price of your repairs, it will not. Repair facilities should welcome you in to their “home,” treat folks the way they want their wife, mother, sister or daughter to be treated. Women want to enjoy the experience.

I am not saying your repair facility has to be like a Ritz Carlton spa, but there are some easy and inexpensive touches that can make a woman feel more comfortable.

Last but not least… and, to me, the most important for women:

• A clean restroom, and I mean clean. No woman likes to go in to a public restroom that has not been maintained, supplies replaced or has an unpleasant odor.

There is a facility in Phoenix, Arizona that took a clean restroom one step further. At Community Tire and Repair the owners wife said, “we can increase our business and maintain our loyal customers if we show our largest audience that our facility is female friendly,” and that she did. Everything was addressed from the customized baby changing table to the Tuscan sink and vanity.

There are foam soap and paper towels, but you will also find a note in a frame on the vanity that states … feminine products provided and they are always maintained. The biggest surprise was a stack of infant size diapers with “Wet Ones” under the sink. It is like going to grandmas and not having to open your diaper bag.

Women are brand loyal and will tell other women about their experiences. We don’t need a special room painted in pink, or photos of women in a mechanic’s jumpsuit at the door. We want to be treated with respect and have you understand what’s important to us. Just like this article, woman know what they want, now can the businesses deliver?

 

Here are some statistics that repair facilities should know as well as any other retail or service businesses in America. This is a compilation of statistics from the Harvard Business Journal, Forbes and Nielsen Ratings:

• Women own 40% of all American private businesses.

• Senior Women, age 50 plus, have a combined net worth of $19 trillion.

• 1.3 million women earn over $100,000 annually.

• Women spend over 58% of all retail dollars spent in the U.S.

• 68% of new car purchase decisions are made by women.

• 65% of requested service at dealers are made by women.

• Women spend over $200 billion on new cars and mechanical servicing of vehicles in the US each year.

• 78% of women identify themselves as the primary household shopper.

• Over the course of a family’s life, 90% of all married women will control its wealth.

 

For more about women, and what they want, go to www.twofortheroadusa.com.

TRUtalk with Leslee Alexander Gibbs

“You can find love if you open your heart to the possibilities.”

Leslee Alexander Gibbs is the founder of TRUmatch, the top matchmaking firm in AZ, and is considered an expert in the field of dating, relationships and LOVE!  Join Leslee as she shares with you her lessons in life; her reflections on the past and vision for the future.  With you, she will uncover the mysteries of what men really want and give you the insight you need to understand women.

“Love is my passion and I am proud to share with you my thoughts, my heart and my words… I call it TRUtalk.” - Leslee Alexander Gibbs

Visit MyTRUmatch.com for more information.

Dear TRUtalk,

I have been single for more than 5 years and it is growing old. I want to have a life partner but it is so difficult to meet a good man. My girlfriend and I go out all the time but never seem to meet anyone. Am I doing something wrong? Where can I go to meet a quality guy?

Dear “Fiver,”

It does not matter where you go to meet a man, what does matter is how you approach it. You can have a huge change in your results by making a slight change in your behavior. Here are  3 secrets to get you noticed:

• When you “go out with the girls,” choose a place that lends itself to an after work crowd.

• Do not sit down in the main dining area. Stay in a neutral location (patio, lounge, etc.) that is a high traffic area.

• Last but most importantly, keep yourself open! Do not get so engaged in “girl talk” that you appear closed off to your surroundings. Make eye contact with people (men AND women) as they enter the room. Give them a gentle smile. This gets you noticed as being friendly and open. Get up from the table occasionally, making yourself available to conversation and take an opportunity to initiate conversation when possible.

Too often a “girls night out” turns into a quiet dinner and intimate conversation – reserve those moments for dates. A night out with friends should be fun and engaging- change your objective and you will change your results!

 

Dear TRUtalk,

“I recently met a guy and we totally connect–physically, intellectually…totally mutual…everything is great. But there’s one problem…he is nearly 40 and wants to have a child of his own…but I feel like that part of my life is done. Is there any way around such a problem? Even if we split, there’s no telling if he or I will meet someone as compatible…Can a dealbreaker become a dealmaker?”

Dear Compatible,

I work with individuals each day on determining what they are looking for in a match. Each person has their own “must haves” that are important in their dating lives. Having children or wanting to have children is one of the most important decisions you can make in your adult life. To say that you are compatible with someone in every way except on one of the most important core issues makes you not compatible.  If you move forward with the relationship it would become such a source of frustration and, ultimately, heartbreak for both of you that I say walk away while you still can. You might not find someone as compatible as you are together but I am confident you will find someone who shares your future vision and that is more important.

How Can Our Children Survive on Their Own?

As parents, we ask ourselves the question, “Did I give my child the right morals, values and tools to be independent when they leave home or go off to college?”

There are so many parents that love their children but have done so much for them that they cannot think for themselves. They often contact their mother or father for advice and use that relationship as a crutch instead of handling and working through their own problems.

If our children are not taught how to be responsible, then they will not thrive as young adults.

As a mother and Child Development Specialist, I asked myself that same question. “Have I done a good job teaching my daughters how to be responsible adults?” After speaking to parents with teens who are leaving for college or trying to find a job, my partner and I decided to write a new handbook that addresses life skills.

This handbook is entitled “Help! I’m On My Own!” This handbook is user friendly. Parents can read the material and review each section with their young adult. Some of the topics covered include:

 

Relationships and Dating Advice: How to have a healthy relationship and the warning signs of an unhealthy one.

Auto Care: Taking care of your car and important documents to keep inside it.

Money Matters:  How to balance a checkbook, online banking, credit cards, student loans, establishing credit, etc.

Dealing with a Landlord:  Understanding a rental agreement, roommate issues, and parking.

Shopping, Spending, and Saving On Your Own: This includes making good decisions and being a smart shopper.

Balanced Living:  How to stay healthy, coping with stress, balancing school and fun, balancing jobs and schoolwork.

Interviewing and Job Tips: Writing resumes and cover letters, what to wear to an interview.

Sex and Stuff:  Understanding Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs), and pregnancy prevention.

Laundry and Living Away from Home: What to bring when you move out.

There are many more topics you may need to discuss with your young adult; however these are a few important life skills included in “Help, I’m On My Own” that a teen should learn in order to become independent. Parents need to model and discuss these lessons with their young adult prior to their moving away from home.

In order to help your teen, this booklet can be your guide. This booklet is available on May 14, 2013. Please feel free to contact Linda by posting and liking on her Facebook page, or call at 602-615-6180.

Andris Kener: Fresh Skin Care that Delivers Results

EGF FOR SKIN CARE

Skin care products with Epidermal Growth Factor (EGF) have been covered quite a bit in the press and have sparked my interest.  EGF was discovered in 1986 by two scientists who were awarded a Nobel Prize for their ground breaking research.  EGF is naturally generated by your body and is a key factor in that promotes skin rejuvenation.

Living in the Phoenix, we experience blistering hot weather in the summer and cold winters.  Summers are very dry in the desert and during cold months, the running of heaters depletes moisture from the indoor air.  I felt like I couldn’t win with my skin.  Being in my forties, it has become more important to take proper care of it.  I’ve tried many products but have not been fully satisfied with them.  When I discovered the EGF Revitalizing Serum product from Andris Kener, I thought I would give it a try without really knowing what to expect as I have experienced disappointments in the past with so many other products.

First Impressions

The product packaging looks stylish and its dark colored jar emanates an image of elegance. When I applied the serum on my face, I immediately noticed the product was light and refreshing. There was no greasy or oily film and I didn’t feel like I needed to wash my hands after I used it.  Dermatologists and skin care specialists have advised me that applying lotions and skin creams after a shower or bath promotes optimal absorption by the body.  Therefore, I applied the product immediately after bathing and I also applied the product on my neck as I don’t want wrinkles and flaws in my neck to give away my age.

I was pleasantly surprised when after one week of consistently using the product, I noticed my eye wrinkles and the dark circles were reduced. The crepe-y skin under my eyes was plumper and less noticeable. Three weeks later, I was overjoyed when a friend suddenly made the remark that my skin looked younger and more radiant.  A cosmetic surgeon that I recently visited also commented on my skin.  He was surprised how soft my hands were.  I attribute the softness of my hands to the fact that I don’t wash the Revitalizing Serum off after applying the product to my face.  I rub the excess into my hands and the effects are noticeable.  I apply my makeup over the product without experiencing flaking or the product rubbing off.  I haven’t used foundation primer since switching to this product.

I realized that my skin has become smoother, brighter and more even toned. Also, the redness and discoloration that usually drove me to apply my makeup before going anywhere had noticeably improved.  My skin looked and felt very soothed.

As I dug deeper to find out the reason for the changes, I discovered what has been observed is exactly what can be expected. EGF is known to stimulate increased production of collagen and elastin and improve local blood circulation. As the body slows down its EGF production with age, supplementing the EGF through external means, promotes skin cell regeneration. The result is better skin elasticity and this gives skin a younger, softer and more desirable complexion.

What is so unique about the product?

The benefits of EGF in skin care are well known. But how do you ensure EGF is still in its most effective state from the time it was bioengineered to the time when it is applied? It’s hard for consumers to test that. The only feasible and realistic measure is to observe the performance of it in products and actual results. In my opinion, Andris Kener seems to have achieved a solution that keeps the EGF highly effective. Based on my personal with experience using the product, EGF can have dramatic results when used consistently.

When I was considering trying a product with EGF, before making a selection, I also looked into the different companies who manufactured products with EGF.  What I learned about Andris Kener and the history behind their product distinguished them from other companies.

• The product was developed for medical applications by a doctor.  It was prescribed by a doctor for use in hospitals to promote wound healing and help repair damaged skin in burn patients and individuals with skin trauma.

• Patients undergoing treatments, such as radiation, didn’t want to continue treatment due to deteriorating skin conditions.  The patients lost hope and self-esteem resulting in the doctor’s need for a solution to restore the patients’ confidence.

• The EGF product was developed and used for nearly 20 years to successfully help patients heal and regain confidence and self-esteem.

I am not aware of another company with an EGF product on the market that has a track record and history like this. Just recently, this solution has been offered as a skin care product to the general consumers.

Conclusion

The Andris Kener product delivers the results the company promises.  My skin is softer and more radiant. As a testament, several people have commented on the beauty of my skin since I have been using it.

The Andris Kener product combines the best of nature and science and offers the latest cutting-edge discoveries in skin care.  The Andris Kener team really cared about what they were delivering to me.  I received information that was not only relevant to their product but also to educate me on my skin and how to properly care for it.  The product contains all the essentials of a robust skin care regimen. As the product is unscented, men would likely be comfortable using it and not have to be concerned about any detectable scent.

In summary, I am pleased with the company and the product they have to offer.  I’m hoping to see a body cream and more from them in the future.

Mother’s Day Activities for the Family

Something mothers can really appreciate on Mother’s Day is time away from the usual house chores, cooking and cleaning.  However our families can make it happen, we long for a day where there are no dishes or clothes to wash, hand prints on the stainless steel appliances, toothpaste smudged on the counter tops and backpacks dropped in the walkways.  Dads are often charged with making something happen on Mother’s Day especially when the children are young.  Cookies, flowers, candies and cards will be flying off the shelves this week in preparation for Mother’s Day this coming Sunday, May 12th.  But, if you are anything like me, a day at the spa is nice and so are flowers but homemade gifts and sharing special times with the children are even more desirable. I’d like to spend quality time having fun with my kids and make a mess that is not in my kitchen or my house that I will later clean up.

In light of our Mother’s Day wish that messes will magically disappear that day, I thought I’d share a few events around Phoenix where kids can make homemade gifts or share time in the kitchen with no mess for mom to clean up.  Here is a list of some activities scheduled in Phoenix that kids can enjoy one on one with mom or the entire family.

Mother’s Day may not be the only day you are looking for something to do with your children either, Although, it is an important one.  It is difficult when everyone has their own lives and such busy schedules to make one on one time together.  Another site worth visiting that has suggestions on all sorts of activities for kids, in Phoenix, or wherever you may be is Kid Pep.  Kid Pep lists a variety of activities for families with children and it’s not just limited to the Phoenix area.  It’s a resource you can refer to if you are traveling or perhaps we’ve captured a reader that is out of state.

From all of us at SmartFem.com, we wish you a beautiful, loving and relaxing Mother’s Day 2013.

AJ’s Fine Foods:

Locations throughout Phoenix Valley

AJ’s through-out the valley will be holding their Little Chefs Club event on Saturday, May 12th.  Each AJ’s will coordinate its own activity so you will need to check with your local store for times and the specific activity.  In the past, Little Chefs Club has decorated Mother’s Day cookies and made tiered cookie cakes.  There have also been events where children made heart shaped pizzas and cute homemade cards.

Sur La Table:

Scottsdale Fashion Center and Kierland locations

Sur La Table in Scottsdale Fashion Square and Kierland offer cooking classes all month long.  On Sunday, May 12^th, both stores will be holding a Mommy & Me Bake: Cupcakes class beginning at 11:00 am.  The cost is $35 per person and children ages 5 and up can attend the event.  This is well worth it as your little chef can frost to his heart’s content and the mess stays behind.  Space is still available and you can register for the event on line at the Sur La Table website.

Arizona Museum for Youth

35 N Robson, Mesa

Children ages 6-12 are invited to make a unique recipe holder and a lovespoon for their mother. The class is scheduled for one hour and begins at 10:30 am on Sunday, May 12^th. General admission to the museum is required and this special class is an additional $13.  Following the class, families can spend the remainder of the morning and afternoon in the museum.

As You Wish Pottery

Locations throughout Phoenix valley

On Mother’s Day, As You Wish Pottery is holding a special event where mothers and toddlers can paint together and create a ceramic plate.  Refreshments will be served in the shops and you can spend as much time as you like working on your masterpiece. The cost for the event is $25.  Remember the pieces do have to be fired so you will come back the following week to pick up your completed art work.

Lowe’s Home Improvement

Locations throughout Phoenix valley

Every other Saturday, Lowe’s holds a kids craft workshop.  You will need to check your local Lowe’s store to confirm times as they may vary slightly throughout the valley.  Most workshops begin at 10:00 am.  This Saturday, May 11^th, children work with a Lowe’s specialist to create a lovely heart shaped box for their beloved mothers.

 

Cathy’s Car Corner – 2013 Buick Enclave

Review of the 2013 Buick Enclave.

Buick is the new 30.

Remember when the word Buick evoked visions of our grandparents; complete with white hair and practical shoes, moving slowly towards their large vanilla looking car? Well that has all changed; Buick is cool, young and comes in many flavors.

The 2013 Buick Enclave has been ranked the #1 affordable midsize SUV by both consumers and automotive journalists. After test-driving the Enclave myself, I wished it were an option when I was car-pooling my kids to baseball, soccer, violin lessons and work. In my thirties, the suburban or a station wagon was the most practical option, or unattractive alternative.

The 2013 Buick Enclave makes total sense for the young, affluent buyers with growing families or empty-nesters with grandparent ties and road trip vacations. The other group of potential owners for the Enclave would be shoppers of the Acura MDX, Audi Q7 or Volvo SC90.

The Buick Enclave delivers the goods for the money in terms of amenities, space, styling and efficiency. They kept the price reasonable to the point where it’s thousands less than others in its class and offers that luxury experience any generation wants and demands.

It also delivers room for seven adults, not five grownups and two kindergarteners. Buick did it right with the slide and fold captain’s chairs for the second row of seating, which is easily operated with one hand, clearing a wide path to the third row of seats. Bench seats are also available.

Behind that, the cargo space is enough to accommodate luggage, camping equipment or strollers.

There have been some nice cosmetic improvements. There is a new good-looking instrument panel with a stylish face and easy to access intellilink touchscreen display. It has remote keyless entry, rear child security door lock, rear vision camera system, side blind zone alert with rear cross traffic alert, tri-zone air conditioning and a leather wrap steering wheel with audio controls and XM radio.

It might as well pull itself in and out of the garage and have my coffee placed in one of the ten cup holders each morning.

The 2013 version of the Enclave has laminated glass and ample sound deadening material to create a passenger space that is whisper quiet at highway speeds. I tested this on the local freeway, but I could still hear three-year-old Sofia singing, “Old McDonald Had A Farm” very clearly and very off tune.

The basic shape of the Enclave remains, but a new front fascia and hood, LED enhanced headlamps and new signature “waterfall” grille gives the 2013 a fresh rejuvenated look, much like a day at the spa.

The standard Enclave has all the comforts and convinces any gender desires including its award-winning safety features. There are 3rd row side curtain bags that stay inflated longer in the event of a rollover, and a new INDUSTRY FIRST center side airbag in the center console that protects driver and front seat passenger from opposite side impacts. The Enclave starts at $39, 270. The one I tested was $51,000.

If you want to know what’s under the hood to move this incredible machine, you will find a 3.6 liter V6, 288 horsepower engine with EPA statistics of 17 City and 24 highway.

All in all, the 2013 Buick Enclave lives up to its #1 ranking in the midsize SUV category and evokes new visions of Buick owners, and one of them could be you!

For more reviews go to www.twofortheroadusa.com

 

A Whole New World

It’s a difficult transition in a woman’s life when she graduates to the “Misses” clothing section of department stores.

It’s hard to resist the temptation of the Juniors section, which resembles the best party you’ve never been invited to. The bright lights, the rainbow of colors, the upbeat music and the glitter on the floor can be intoxicating to the eyes.

I once thought I was having a seizure, but then realized I was just in the dressing room of the Juniors section at Macy’s.

When you graduate to the Misses section, you realize that it has a different feel. No longer are you greeted by pictures of fresh-faced young women who appear to be having the best day of their entire lives simply by wearing leggings as pants and a see-thru blouse while jumping into the air.

Instead, the Misses section feels more like you are now a member of the book club, “Lonely Literate Ladies of the Library Who Embrace Lace and the Occasional Lower Leaking.”

You walk through a maze of aisles littered with embroidered holiday sweatshirts, turtlenecks and cap-sleeved shirts in putrid colors like mint, taupe, off-white and mother of pearl. The only music you can hear is the faint sound of Edwain McCain singing, “I’ll be Your Crying Shoulder,” which is playing on repeat as you slowly digest your new reality.

You search and search for something “fun” to wear to your girl’s night out, which now starts at 4 pm on a Saturday and consists of a “party” at a friend’s house who is trying to sell you crappy candles that never burn out, over-priced purses that resemble diaper bags (but you can get your initials embroidered on them for only $30 extra) and over-priced costume jewelry made by some chick named, “Lia Sophia,” who I am convinced was that girl in high school who told me that my Gap sweatshirt was “so two years ago.”

Sadly, it’s inevitable that every lady must eventually embrace the Misses section. There comes a time when we must get over the delusion that we can walk into a Wet Seal or Forever 21 store and NOT get the stink eye from every young sales associate who has figured out that a small waist is more celebrated than intellect in our society.

We should no longer be shocked when we enter these stores and are immediately asked, “Are you looking for something for your daughter?” I, of course, say all of this out of righteous jealousy.

I realize that this can be an overwhelming and confusing process so I’m here to help.

Below, I’ve devised a list of when you know it’s time to venture on over to the Misses section:

1)     You are trying on the same outfit as your granddaughter.

2)     You have a granddaughter.

3)     You’ve used a rotary phone in your lifetime.

4)     You have ever uttered the words, “It’s too loud in here.”

5)     You eat yogurt for the probiotics, which was recommended to you by your doctor after your recent colonoscopy.

6)     You listen to NPR…even on the weekends.

7)     You no longer ask for an STD test when at your annual lady appointment.

8)     You have conversations with your friends that begin with, “Broccoli makes me gassy.”

9)     You remember Reaganomics.

10)  Your husband was in WW1.

Good luck! It’s an unjust world out there. However, we can change it. In order to do so, we must band together and redefine beauty in our society. We should demand that women over the age of 30 are treated equally and have the right to be sold attractive clothing.

We should occupy the aisles of every department store until age is deemed more beautiful than youth. We should…well, let’s be honest, we’re all too invested in “The Real Housewives” to find time for any of that. The new season of Orange County just started and Vicki has a new chin!

 

 

A video from the author… 

Celebrities, Golf, and Fashion to Save Teens

To say that it can be a scary world these days is an understatement…especially for many teenagers. But there are still some heroes out there who do what they can to make a difference. I am proud to say that I have had the honor and privilege to work with Alice Cooper’s amazing team at his recent Solid Rock fundraisers. It is so refreshing to see people come together for the benefit of others.

Legendary rocker Alice Cooper is Mr. Nice Guy. He uses his celebrity status to create a program that keeps underprivileged Phoenix teenagers safe. For years Alice and his wife Sheryl Cooper have championed the cause to create a safe and fun place for teens. That dream was realized last year with the grand opening of Alice Cooper’s Solid Rock in Phoenix, AZ.

In addition to being a rocker, Alice is so also a skilled golfer and he puts together charity golf tournaments to raise funds and awareness for Solid Rock.

Last weekend Hollywood celebrities as well as professional athletes came together to show their support. It was an amazing array of high profile people coming together for charity. Some of the celebrities who attended were: John O’Hurley of Seinfeld, Rob Morrow of Northern Exposure and Numbers, and celebrity Allstate Spokesperson and actor Dennis Haysbert, just to name a few.

This year the ladies were also included in the fun and attended a Rock the Runway fashion show hosted by SmartFem magazine. The theme was 1940s retro/rockabilly with a little edge. The fashions were modeled by Sheryl and Morgan Cooper and the Solid Rock dancers. Lea Haben, publisher of SmartFem was the emcee and the fashions were provided by Stinkin’ Cute Boutique of Mesa, E and J Shoes of Scottsdale, and by Evans Furs and Fine Leathers of Scottsdale. The attendees were all treated to some incredible swag bags which included earrings courtesy of Kendra Scott Jewelry. Rolf’s Salon and Spa also did an amazing job on the hair and makeup for all the models.

The team of winning golfers were each treated to a customized leather jacket courtesy of Evans Furs. It was an exciting and successful event thanks to everyone who attended and showed their support for charity and also to Alice and Sheryl Cooper for their generous philanthropic efforts to make the Solid Rock Foundation a reality.

For more pictures, check out SmartFem’s Facebook Page

Is More Video Surveillance the Answer for Better Security?

With the recent bombing at the Boston Marathon there has been a lot of talk in the media the past week about video surveillance and security. The talk ranges from whether we need more video surveillance cameras to increase security and prevent future attacks to a concern about the Government watching our every move and further stepping on our civil liberties.

The role of government, the primary role of our government, is to provide protection against foreign aggression. Most people would agree that our government has done a very good job of stopping further large-scale terrorist attacks since 9/11. Our airports, harbors and mass transit systems are very heavily protected through the deployment of personnel and technology. To call for the government to go further and deploy video surveillance in every major city is an open invitation to creating a police state. That is not the answer. 
 The role of citizens in a democratic society is to participate in public life. That means we, the citizens, are obligated to be informed about public issues, carefully watch how our elected officials and how they use their powers, and to voice our own opinions and interests. It was the citizens of Boston – the business video surveillance system, residence and visitors using smart phones – that provided the information and images that lead to the identification and ultimate capture of the attackers.

In this conversation, it is important to understand video surveillance and how the technology functions. Video surveillance systems provide for continuous viewing of live images and storage of recorded events. Continuous viewing, watching what is happening as it happens, requires a constant set of human eyes on the cameras to see and identify potential threats. Viewing recorded events can be done anytime from almost anywhere, but are rarely needed [or viewed] until after an event – crime, attack, etc. Video surveillance is a very effective deterrent and valuable for providing information and images after the fact. The truth is video surveillance, by itself, does not stop attacks and will not stop foreign or domestic aggression. Video surveillance, coupled with other technologies and the watchful, alert and informative citizens will help spot potential attacks and provide the information and identification needed to stop or apprehend attackers.

So, is more video surveillance the answer? If we are looking for one technology to keep us completely safe, then no, more video surveillance isn’t the answer. However, if we are looking to enhance our own security and provide government authorities with helpful information about crimes against the citizens of the United States, then more video surveillance, in the hands of citizens is part of the answer.

-David Murphy shares his expertise and experience on security issues for individuals, families and businesses.  He is the founder and CEO of Xpress Protection Security Solutions and a featured SmartFem Expert

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