Why It’s Hard Making and Keeping Friends as a Mom

I became a mom at 19 years old. Today, as a 26-year-old mom of a 7-year-old, I am constantly asked if my daughter is my little sister or if I’m her babysitter. Becoming a mother changed my life in more ways than I can explain, making me the woman I am today.

While being a mother doesn’t define me, it definitely plays a major role in my day to day life. My days and schedules revolve around my child. That means date nights don’t happen without a baby sitter, and most travel plans consist of Disneyland or some other fun park.

One of the things that took the biggest hits when becoming a mom were my friendships. Once I became a mom, friendships took a backseat in my list of priorities. It was hard to explain to single friends why I couldn’t “hang out” anymore. Many didn’t think being a mom was enough of an excuse.

There are many reasons why it’s hard making and keeping friends as a mom. Below are my top three struggles with the matter.

Time is sacred

The lack of free time is one of the reasons it’s so hard to make friends as a mom. Sunday brunch dates and shopping trips aren’t as easy when you have a child to look after. Time not spent working or caring for the child is often used to run errands and catch up on all the other responsibilities of life.

I deal with mom guilt

Struggling with mom guilt has been one of the most challenging battles of being a mom. I feel guilty when I’m with my child and not devoting my full attention. I also feel guilty when I’m caring for myself and not spending time with my child. Mom guilt is a hard topic to discuss with someone who doesn’t deal with it, so it usually gets bottled inside.

They’re not a priority

Sounds horrible doesn’t it? However, friendships aren’t something I’ve prioritized since becoming a mom. My personal life as a mom, mother, and entrepreneur keep me busy and it’s a constant struggle to add more to my plate.

Fortunately, I’ve learned how to cope with the difficulties of having friends as a mom. I’ve realized that befriending women with similar lifestyles may not mean regular girls’ trips, but it does mean having a group of women who understand you and have your back.

If you’re struggling with making and keeping friends as a mom, know you’re not alone. There are millions of women just like you looking for a loving, caring, and comprehending friend.